Monday, December 12, 2016

A crazy feverish post from the third floor of the library

Anxiety, it is something that appears when I don't want it to and sometimes when I don't expect it.  In this case, writing two research papers combined with my procrastination have left the door wide open for my unwelcome guest.  Sleepless nights, irritability, stomach aches, shallow breathing, sallow skin and dark circles under my eyes have not helped me to feel my best.  I keep struggling and struggling to get past this mental block that I am not a good writer, I want to be perfect, I want to get a good grade, I am afraid of "failing", what was that that Winston Churchill said about failure? That quote that I have posted in my classroom at work and that I post often to remind myself of? Oh, "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts". When I have an assignment due, specifically a paper to write for school, I start using avoidance techniques, I find everything else to do until it is the last moment and then I build up this insurmountable "monster" out of my task to accomplish.  It becomes so big, that it almost swallows me whole.

Today, this morning, I woke up and decided, that it is only a paper, I will do my best, it won't be perfect, because honestly, my writing stinks. Probably because I avoid doing it so much.  I recently read about the "evaporated people" in Japan including one young student that disappeared himself because he was so afraid of failure.  But failure isn't something we should be terrified of, it is something that happens sometimes, and we move on.  It's part of being brave, part of getting to "the other side of fear" and finding everything I want.  Today, I am "embracing the suck" a suck that I would prefer not to have to embrace, I will embrace it. Research paper, I refuse to let you own my life anymore, It's ok if I don't get a perfect score on my paper, I am trying my hardest.  Thanks Mr. Churchill I needed that reminder.


Some other great quotes from ole' Winston:


Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.
If you're going through hell, keep going.
You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.
Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak. Courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen
Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.
Never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never—in nothing, great or small, large or petty—never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense.
History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.
We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.

Thursday, May 5, 2016

For the Love of Woolx: A Review of the Woolx Basic Tee

I have always worn wool garments especially for running and outdoor adventures because of the amazing breatheability and the non-stink factor.  Wool has often had a bad rap as being too hot or itchy.  However, it remains my top favorite fabric to wear! Recently I stumbled upon a new brand of merino wool outdoor clothing and performance wear from a company called WoolX. On Facebook they were having a sale and I really liked the way their running capris looked so I purchased them.

Woolen running capris don't sound like they would be very comfortable and the last time I purchased a pair of merino wool running capris I had to return them because of the ill-fit and the saggy-ness that happened when they got sweaty during a run.  This pair was different!  The fit was great, there was a nice pocket on the side and I took them out for a trail run.  They performed super well, I didn't get too hot and they didn't sag at all. I love them and will have to buy another pair in another color!  The other great thing about these is that they do not stink!  I can wear them a couple of times before having to wash them, which is an additional plus for the environment!  Here is a picture of me enjoying my Fearless by WoolX capris:


So I tried out one of their woolx basic tee in black to see how that would perform during trail running.
 Here is my new Woolx basic tee package that arrived very quickly!  
I tried it on right away and loved it! The fit is great and the length is perfect.  Aaaand there was no itch whatsover.  WoolX guarantees their clothing will be 100% itch-free.

The other really great thing about WoolX is that the prices are awesome!  Most merino wool sportswear is very expensive, but I found that WoolX's prices are very reasonable.  I put my new shirt on and took it for a spin on the trails.  It performed very well, again, super breatheable, when I sweated I didn't get a sticky, wet or stinky feel at all.  In fact, I did not wash the shirt and just hung it up and wore it again today on another run.  Even though it still doesn't smell I may wash it this time, but I may not!
I highly recommend Woolx and right now there is a 12% off sale going on.
You can find Woolx on their facebook page  or go to woolx.com. Check them out!
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I have now washed my Woolx basic tee and followed the instructions to wash in cold water and turn inside out, I did not dry it in the dryer but just hung it over a chair to dry and then I have worn it pretty much every day! Thanks #Woolx!

Wednesday, February 10, 2016

Fuego y Agua 2016: The anticipation of a baby's birth

Before I forget and get engrossed in my everyday life again, I want to write about my experiences and trip to Fuego y Agua Nicaragua 2016.

My mom once said, while waiting for my sister to finish the Leadville 100 mile race, that the anticipation and waiting for runners to finish was worse than waiting for a baby to be born.  She would know, she's had a lot of them.  This year at Fuego y Agua was like that.

I have been going to Fuego Y Agua almost every year since its inception in 2008.  I only missed the first year and then again in 2013.  I look forward to every February because I get to travel to a tropical island in the middle of winter and meet incredible people.  The other reason I go is because my brother is the race director and mastermind behind it all and it gives me an excuse to see him and help with the organization and volunteer for the race.

In 2011 I ran the 50k and finished 2nd woman.  In 2012 my brother came up with the Survival Run concept where the race is run through both volcanoes but includes challenges of different kinds that mimic some of the native islanders daily tasks and/chores.  Every year I have volunteered but have wanted to participate in the Survival Run itself.  This year, I decided was the year I would try my hand at it. This year was also different because Josue and Corinne were expecting a baby almost exactly on the date of the ultra races.

Because I was participating in the Survival Run, I was not "in" like I usually am and was not privy to any of the information or challenges that were being planned by the race staff.  All I knew is that Josue had told me it "would be harder than last year" and that most people would drop out before the first half.

I can always say that my training leaves more to be desired.  but I did train, just not a lot or enough. Last year I had volunteered for the 2015 Survival Run and had made a pact with Aimee Booth that we would be a team and try to be the first women to finish. My training consisted of mostly running, rock climbing, hiking, several technical 50k's and Bikram yoga, with a little bit of body strength training sprinkled throughout.  I know how Josue thinks, I have helped him in previous races, I've been up both volcanoes multiple times and I have completed the Hunter-Gatherer race in Texas.  I knew he would probably have tree climbing, swimming and/or diving, and eggs and/or chickens.  What I didn't know is that I would have to carry plantains up and down Concepción!  A day or two before my trip, my team mate Amie called me and informed me that due to work and family related issues she would not be able to make it.

I was ready mentally but not 100% physically.  Our trip down there was super smooth and we got to Managua Hills where we met up with several ultra-runners and three survival runners, Jamie Boyle, Mitchel Woods, and Dave Gluhareff.  After having a nice dinner, a shower and a good night's sleep we woke up for our shuttle taxi for San Jorge where we would catch a ferry to get to the island of Ometepe.  My brother had mentioned that several adventure racers were coming this year and I had the pleasure of meeting them on the shuttle.  Once I met Kyle, Paul and Dylan, I had a feeling that these guys were going to do really well.  They all had multiple expedition races under their belts and seemed super tough.

We arrived at Ometepe where Josue and Sean picked us up in Moyogalpa and took us to Santo Domingo, the race start and finish.  It felt weird not to be participating in all of the race preparations but nice at the same time.  Because one thing I know about putting on a race (even though I've only volunteered), it is super hard! Especially in a country like Nicaragua where amenities do not abound and connectivity makes things a hundred times harder.  I got to relax, meet some other runners, work on my grad coursework and hang out with my sister Abi.

Race morning came and I felt that my water bladder was too full and my pack was too heavy, and yet I knew we were probably climbing volcán Concepción first and that it would be hot! So I decided to keep it full and had super-hydrated the day before by drinking 6 x 32oz. Nalgene bottles of water mixed with electrolytes, plus several juices.  During check-in we received a colored strip of fabric and I quickly noticed that there were 4 other colors and surmised there would probably be a team challenge.  Sure enough! After we started, my green team comprised of 13 people had to carry 8 large bamboo poles down the beach about 3.5 kilometers then had to build a raft and carry 2 out of 3 rocks to an island.  Our raft was build pretty well but not buoyant enough to carry two rocks and one was lost on the way over.  Luckily, we had one rock left on the beach and had to do a second trip out.  At the island we were to gather a container with our team color on it full of eggs and pieces of a puzzle that we were to complete on the mainland.  By the time we swam back to the mainland, the rest of our team had completed most of the puzzle and were waiting for us to disassemble the raft.  We received our bib numbers and were told that we were no longer a team but we would have to show an unbroken egg at each checkpoint.  I quickly packed 2 extra eggs in my pack for a total of 3 just in case.
As I ran up the dirt road I came to the first challenge in the actual race, getting 20 lbs of plantains and carrying them in a feed sack unharmed.  I continued up the road and was passed by Morgan McKay who was moving at a really quick clip.  I saw a little store and stopped to buy a gatorade, knowing that the volcano climb was imminent. The trail turned up and we started climbing.  Pretty soon I arrived at the second challenge, a tree climb.  There was a choice of 3 trees and they were all slippery and sweaty from all the previous climbers.  We were instructed to climb and get our slingshot rubbers to make a slingshot.  I quickly climbed up, chopped a y-shaped branch and took off with my plantains.

Little by little the climb got steeper and steeper.  It seemed to never end.  Helene passed me, as well as Arian and several others.  I was also passing people, people that were already out of water and getting heat exhaustion and we weren't even past the halfway up point on the volcano.  I was really conserving my water because I knew there were no refills till we got to the bottom.  Some people were saying that we had to carry the plantains to the top but I wouldn't believe it.  Well, once I got to the top, I was sure I was going to miss the cutoff but Frasier said I still had 30 mins AND that I was to keep carrying the plantains till the next checkpoint around the other side of the volcano rim.  I hustled to get to the next checkpoint because I wanted to make the cutoff.  At Robin Johanson's challenge, we had 5 tries to shoot at a small target.  We had to hit the target once to be able to collect our first bracelet.  I practiced and it seemed that my poorly constructed slingshot was pretty acurate so I went ahead and made my 5 shots.  2 of them were super close and the rest were waaaay off, so I quickly packed up and took off.  My heart sank when Robin informed me we had to carry the plantains to the bottom.  I was moving pretty quickly and felt great, still had water and I felt strong.  But as the darkness came, things got a little harder.  I started falling, and my quads started to feel it.  Billy McKenna caught up to me at a point and said he wanted to buddy up during the dark which I was grateful for.  He had been out of water for hours and at this point my water was super low, I had already given some to Mitchell who was suffering pretty badly at this point.

 We made our way slowly down the volcano and kept getting passed by people who had not made the cutoff and had dropped their plantains.  I kept hope that I would somehow make the cutoff at the bottom so I kept my plantains.  Towards the base, the sweepers caught up to us, we could hear the checkpoint at Los Ramos but I was told that I had missed the cutoff by 1 hour so I finally gave up and dumped my plantains and continued on.  When we got to the road, my quads were so shot that I couldn't even run, because my knees kept buckling I had to hold onto Billy.  What sweet relief it was to sit down at the checkpoint and drink a cold coke.  I was super bummed that I had not made the cutoff and that my race was over.  I really really wanted to finish but at least I knew that Helene and Morgan were still out there and one of them would probably finish. I had a feeling that Helene had the determination and that this race had been a thorn in her side since last year.  Plus she had signed up for the Devil's Double.

The rest of the race was a waiting game, waiting for runners, waiting for the baby to be born.  It was an incredible moment to see Paul and Dylan cross the finish line as well as the other 3 men but when Helene crossed, it was a victory for me  My eyes were misty and I almost felt as if I were crossing the finish line myself.  I have incredible respect for her and dream of being such an amazing athlete as she is.

The beer mile came and went with its usual hilarity and craziness, we were able to raise almost $1000 for the schools on Ometepe!  Then the planning and organizing for the ultras began with more lack of sleep.

On Feb. 6th the 100 and 50k ultras began at 5am, many of the runners had run FyA previously but many had not.  The day turned into a hot one and people began to experience heat exhaustion, especially some of the 50 and 100k-ers  Many dropped out, many didn't make the time cutoffs but all were amazing for coming out to run such a difficult and crazy race.  The only sleep I got that day was about 1 hour or 2 sleeping on a chair at the finish line, waiting, waiting for runners and waiting to hear if that baby had been born.  I had to leave and catch my ferry and wasn't able to see the first women finishers for the 100k, but I heard it was amazing.  Helene was not only the 1st woman to finish Survival Run Nicaragua but also finished the Devil's Double, which very few people have managed to do.  My friend Meredith was first woman over the 100k finish line, which I was so proud of since this is her longest race ever and last year she only made it to the 50k.

The adventure didn't quite end after the race.  The boys and I jumped on a bus hoping to make it to the 7:30 ferry since our flight left Managua at 2:30.  We arrived at the ferry, bought tickets and jumped on.  I was so tired that I fell asleep for about 1 hour then woke up to find out that due to high winds the ferry would not be leaving anytime soon, and possibly not that same day.  I had resigned myself that we would be missing our flights when I noticed that a lady was trying to schedule a flight off the island.  She said that if we got 12 people together it would cost $100 apiece.  I told her I would like to go but that the situation with my card would not allow me to access any money at that time.  She said that she would trust me to PayPal her and she would cover me and the boys.  So off we went and boarded a Cessna and had an incredible and amazing 20 minute flight straight to the Managua airport.  The boys and I had just enough time to grab a quick bite to eat and get to security and then we were off!

Now I sit here looking out at the winter wonderland of snow and missing the company of all of the incredible racers and volunteers that FyA attracts every year. It was a big year for firsts: A woman finished, a woman finished the Devil's Double, and many racers finished and or attempted FyA for the first time.  Baby Benjamin Oliver was born on Sunday night or early Monday morning!  He is the cutest baby in the world.  All that waiting was worth it.